@ Scrumdown:
An Englishman’s wife steps up to the tee and, as she bends over to place her ball on the tee, a gust of wind blows her skirt up and reveals her lack of underwear.
“Good God, woman! Why aren’t you wearing any undies?” her husband demanded.
“Well, you don’t give me enough housekeeping money to afford any.” The Englishman immediately reaches into his pocket and says, “For the sake of decency, here’s £20. Go and buy yourself some underwear.”
Next, the Irishman’s wife bends over to set her ball on the tee. Her skirt also blows up to show that she too is wearing no undies.
“Blessed Virgin Mary, woman! You’ve no undies. Why not?” She replies, “I can’t afford any on the money you give me.” He reaches into his pocket and says, “For the sake of decency, here’s £10. Go and buy yourself some underwear!”
Lastly, the Scotsman’s wife bends over. The wind also takes her skirt over her head to reveal that she, too, is naked under it.
“Sweet mudder of Jesus, Aggie! Where are yer drawers?”
She too explains, “You dinna give me enough money ta be able ta affarrd any!”
The Scotsman reaches into his pocket and Says, “Well, fer the love ‘O Jesus, here’s a comb. Tidy yerself up a bit.”
Helen Zille, Julius Malema and Number 1 on on a small charter flight to the to Karoo to visit the SKA site when the small plane hits some massive turbulence.
The pilot comes rushing out of the cockpit with a parachute on his back and says to the politicians “We’re going down. There’s only 2 more parachutes, decide between yourselves who’s to survive”, and in a flash he’s out of the door.
Number 1 stands up nervously and says “As President of the Republic I think it’s important that I should have one of the 2 parachutes left.”
Helen pipes up, “I couldn’t agree more Jacob”, and immediately hands him a parachute.
In a flash number 1 is out of the door leaving the two opposition leaders alone in the stricken plane.
Julius looks at Helen and screams at her, “What are you doing Madam, you bloody agent, now one of us has to die”.
Helen looks at him calmly and says “Shut up you silly little man. Jacob just jumped out with my hiking back pack.”
@ Scrumdown:
This is a true story though, told to me by our blogger 4man once, while we were sitting in the Sneeuberg waiting for a black springbok in the herd he had been eanting to take out for days.
4man was at a party in the KZN Midlands, with Lambie’s grandfather, Dr Nick Labuscagne (ex Natal lock) also there. Mort Mortasagne (prop), walked up and said, “Good evening, Dr LaBooSkagNi”, and old Nick, a tall man, turned, looked down at Mort and said somewhat condescendingly, ” The name is LaBooShane, if you would, please”.
Mort walked off, and after a few beers with his his mates he picked up a tray with two flutes of champagne, walked over to Nick where he was standing talking to some of his guests, and Mort said in a booming voice, “Oh, Doctor LaBooShane, I presume, how about another glass of ShamPagNi”!!!
Bwahahaha.
Q. What’s the best thing to ever come out of Scotland?
A. NO SAKKIE, it’s not Whisky, It’s the road to ENGLAND!
@ Scrumdown:
Och Aye, you going to upset some wee laddies mon
2 @ nortierd:
‘Tis true I tell you, ’tis true.
@ Scrumdown:
An Englishman’s wife steps up to the tee and, as she bends over to place her ball on the tee, a gust of wind blows her skirt up and reveals her lack of underwear.
“Good God, woman! Why aren’t you wearing any undies?” her husband demanded.
“Well, you don’t give me enough housekeeping money to afford any.” The Englishman immediately reaches into his pocket and says, “For the sake of decency, here’s £20. Go and buy yourself some underwear.”
Next, the Irishman’s wife bends over to set her ball on the tee. Her skirt also blows up to show that she too is wearing no undies.
“Blessed Virgin Mary, woman! You’ve no undies. Why not?” She replies, “I can’t afford any on the money you give me.” He reaches into his pocket and says, “For the sake of decency, here’s £10. Go and buy yourself some underwear!”
Lastly, the Scotsman’s wife bends over. The wind also takes her skirt over her head to reveal that she, too, is naked under it.
“Sweet mudder of Jesus, Aggie! Where are yer drawers?”
She too explains, “You dinna give me enough money ta be able ta affarrd any!”
The Scotsman reaches into his pocket and Says, “Well, fer the love ‘O Jesus, here’s a comb. Tidy yerself up a bit.”
4 @ nortierd:
Bwahahaha. Got to love the Scots.
Helen Zille, Julius Malema and Number 1 on on a small charter flight to the to Karoo to visit the SKA site when the small plane hits some massive turbulence.
The pilot comes rushing out of the cockpit with a parachute on his back and says to the politicians “We’re going down. There’s only 2 more parachutes, decide between yourselves who’s to survive”, and in a flash he’s out of the door.
Number 1 stands up nervously and says “As President of the Republic I think it’s important that I should have one of the 2 parachutes left.”
Helen pipes up, “I couldn’t agree more Jacob”, and immediately hands him a parachute.
In a flash number 1 is out of the door leaving the two opposition leaders alone in the stricken plane.
Julius looks at Helen and screams at her, “What are you doing Madam, you bloody agent, now one of us has to die”.
Helen looks at him calmly and says “Shut up you silly little man. Jacob just jumped out with my hiking back pack.”
6 @ Scrumdown:
@ Scrumdown:
This is a true story though, told to me by our blogger 4man once, while we were sitting in the Sneeuberg waiting for a black springbok in the herd he had been eanting to take out for days.
4man was at a party in the KZN Midlands, with Lambie’s grandfather, Dr Nick Labuscagne (ex Natal lock) also there. Mort Mortasagne (prop), walked up and said, “Good evening, Dr LaBooSkagNi”, and old Nick, a tall man, turned, looked down at Mort and said somewhat condescendingly, ” The name is LaBooShane, if you would, please”.
Mort walked off, and after a few beers with his his mates he picked up a tray with two flutes of champagne, walked over to Nick where he was standing talking to some of his guests, and Mort said in a booming voice, “Oh, Doctor LaBooShane, I presume, how about another glass of ShamPagNi”!!!
@ Pietman:
Jawat. The pronounciation. Always the pronounciation.
@ Scrumdown:
Apparently this Dr Nick is somewhat of an aristocratic remnant wannabee…
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