A look back at some of the bits I remember best – actually, the bits I remember at all.

By Kevin McCallum, IOL

Choke-up moment:

Even the Channel 9 commentators were lost for words when Graeme Smith walked down through the members stand at the Sydney Cricket Ground in an attempt to salvage a draw from the last Test of the series against Australia. He did not need to bat, indeed, his doctor told him he shouldn’t have batted, but with a hand broken by Mitchell Johnson, an elbow knackered by injury, he cut off his cast, was dressed by Morne Morkel in a dirty jersey and walked on. There wasn’t a dry eye in the house. I think Brett Proctor still gets weepy just thinking about it.
Best gamesmanship:

Before the first Test against the Lions in Durban, John Smit had heard Ian McGeechan had picked Paul O’Connell as captain ahead of Brian O’Driscoll because he wanted the leader of his team to look down on the Bok captain. Smit decided to play some mind games of his own, and for the toss, dressed up in his full step-out kit – Bok blazer, Bok cap, tie, the works – tucked a rugby law book under his arm and arrived early for the toss. He shot the breeze with the referee and when O’Connell arrived, dressed in a warm-up T-shirt and a pair of shorts, he was taken aback. Strike one.

Best chirp:

Bakkies Botha has a quick tongue on him, despite putting on that dead-pan expression at every presser. When Lions scrumhalf Mike Phillips had been getting lippy during one Test, Botha looked at him and said “You’ve got sexy blue eyes”. Phillips didn’t have an answer. Botha also had a pleasant welcome for Owen Franks when he came on as a replacement in the Tri-Nations match in Bloem: “Hello fatty,” said Botha.

Worst awards:

The ICC Player of the Year. Mitchell Johnson named the Test player of the year was strange, but with not one South African being nominated after they beat Australia at home in Tests and ODIs was nothing short of a disgrace.

Smash and grab:

The Indian Premier League. On the surface it was a success, with fans flocking to games and Cricket South Africa seeing a decent kick to their coffers. However, speak to anyone who had to deal with the IPL behind the scenes and you will hear of a horror show. Suppliers were stretched to breaking point, demands on stadiums were way and above what the contracts asked for (the IPL asked for 1000 parking spaces at the Wanderers. The Wanderers does not have 1000 parking bays in total) and, well, it just left a bad taste on those who had to deal with the IPL.

Blessing in disguise:

The disgraceful handling of Caster Semenya had at least one positive outcome: it was the catalyst to get rid of Leonard Chuene, the president of Athletics South Africa, as Sascoc flexed their muscles, ASA blinked, Julius Malema bought himself a big cup of shut-the-hell-up and even Butane unKompelling, Chuene’s champion in parliament, didn’t say a word.

Over-rated:

Not Carlos the saviour, but Teko Modise, who is simply too one-footed to be an international player. Against Iraq in the Confederations Cup, the Iraq defence just guided him on to his left foot and let him run across the face of their line with little effect. He’s all show and no go.

Twit of the year:

Victor Matfield has become one of the more prolific South African sports stars on Twitter. Some of his recent tweets have been amusing, the say the least. In reply to Dan Nicholl asking if he was getting ready to play the Stormers in the Super 14 final next year, he replied: “There is a better chance of you beating me at golf than Stormers reaching the final. So not a big chance.

“No, I don’t have any New Zeeland heritage. Don’t know where they got that. I am a pure Afrikaner. Even struggle with English.”