Being the week of the Currie Cup semi’s, I thought we would institute a Thread where we insult each other without getting heated about it!

Gooooooooooi Mieliessssssssss !

The rules are simple… no swearing at someone’s family, no politicking, no racism, do not go OVERBOARD on player insults… and go relatively easy on very foul language.

This is the place to vent your anger, fear, insecurity… with impunity.

REMEMBER, you are not allowed to get ANGRY !

This should be interesting…. hehehehe

508 Responses to Oop Ketels / Open Season

  • 361

    @Pietman – lol boet i am laughing just as much this side

  • 362

    An Italian, a Scotsman, and a Chinese fellow were hired at a construction site. The foreman pointed out a huge pile of sand and told the Italian guy, “You’re in charge of sweeping.” To the Scotsman he said, “You’re in charge of shoveling.” And to the Chinese guy, “You’re in charge of supplies.”
    He then said, “Now, I have to leave for a little while. I expect you guys to make a dent in that there pile.”
    The foreman went away for a of couple hours, and, when he returned, the pile of sand was untouched. He asked the Italian, “Why didn’t you sweep any of it?” The Italian replied, “I no hava no broom. You said to the Chinese fella that he a wasa in a charge of supplies, but he hasa disappeared and I no coulda finda him nowhere.” Then the foreman turned to the Scotsman and said, “And you, I thought I told you to shovel this pile.”
    The Scotsman replied, “Aye, ye did lad, boot ah couldnay get meself a shoovel! Ye left th’ Chinese gadgie in chairge of supplies, boot ah couldnay fin’ him either.” The foreman was really angry by now and stormed off toward the pile of sand to look for the Chinese guy.

    Just then, the Chinese guy jumped out from behind the pile of sand and yelled…
    “SUPPLIES!!”

  • 363

    ok be back in a bit cheers for now

  • 364

    @Ashley
    Gaan geniet eers jou rugby hierdie naweek, ons sal volgende week die resepte uitsort.
    Ek gaan Miesies Ash n mooi duur geskenkie bring, vir n lekker bobotie….watch!
    En ek pratie van tjoklits nie hoor…

  • 365

    @sharky_forever
    @361
    Ja, reg, maak so!

  • 366

    Cheers manne, more blog ek uit die kaap uit, sal moet check dat daai manne nie oor my skouer loer na wat ek tik nie anders gaan ek pak kry!

  • 367

    A young man asks his father, “Dad, how many kinds of breasts are there?”
    The father, surprised, answers:

    “Well, son, there are three kinds of breasts.
    In her twenties, a woman’s breasts are like melons, round and firm.
    In her thirties to forties, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit.
    After fifty, they are like onions.”
    “Onions?”
    “Yes, see them and they make you cry.”

  • 368

    @Ashley – A young man asks his father, “Dad, how many kinds of breasts are there?”
    The father, surprised, answers:

    “Well, son, there are three kinds of breasts.
    In her twenties, a woman’s breasts are like melons, round and firm.
    In her thirties to forties, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit.
    After fifty, they are like Province.”
    “Province?”
    “Yes, see them and they make you cry.” 😀

  • 369

    Ou Tolla grap,

    Bloubul wat in die kaap bly. Saterdae maak die man net reg vir die Blou Bulle en heeldag is dit net Bulle diekant en bulle daaikant.

    Sy vrou snoer hom toe, ” Ja , jys ook erger oor die Blou Bulle as oor my!”

    Haar man die Blou Bul, ” Fok, Ek is erger oor die WP as oor jou”

  • 370

    @AB
    Ry julle af CG toe?
    Se groete daar man, ek verlang daai KleinKaroo, erg, ek se jou!

  • 371

    jinne…but you okes can talk the biggest load of :poop:

  • 372

    @Pietman – Vlieg tot in PE bly by my sus en ma hulle en ry Vrydag deur CG toe!

  • 373

    @AB – Watch liewers jou hol.

  • 374

    @The-Pill – Ook weer waar!!

  • 375

    @The-Pill
    Daai is niks Pilleman.
    Tolla se die ou staan by sy huis, hy maak reg want die manne kom darts speel Vrydagaand.
    So gooi hy homself n lekker glas wyn en maak alles reg terwyl hy wag….en daas n klop aan die voordeur….
    Ma hysie genugget nie, hy stap deur toe glas innie hand, hy verwag mos nou die manne.
    Maak oop…en daar staan die predikant!
    Hy se: “Ai Gammat, jy het dan soe mooi reggekom, jy gat kerk sing innie koer en als, nou….kom kry ek jou soe, glas innie hand, innie voerdeur…is daai dan al vertroesting wat djy het innie liewe?
    Gammat kyk die glas so, en se: “Nie dominie, ek het darem nog n kannetjie onner die kooi oek!”

  • 376

    What do you call 15 guys sitting around the TV watching the Currie Cup final?

    W.P!!
    :rotfl:

  • 377

    besef julle dat die griquas di afgelope dekade meer bekers as wp gewen het

  • 378

    Ok, cheers alaml, ek gaan waai voordat hierdie thread n 1000 slaat…
    Ek en my pa gaan bietjie kitaar speel, sien julle more.
    Tjorts.

  • 379

    @Pietman – Cheers ou maat!

  • 380

    cheers pieta

  • 381

    @Sharks_Gal – :rotfl:

    And all Bulls supporters you are no longer the baby blues as i have just come up from feeding the monkeys and noticed that the males have SCROTUMS the exact colour of a blue bulls jersey. Bwaahahahahah. Ok am gone again.

  • 382

    In preparation for next year’s World Cup, tourists –

    In preparation for next year’s World Cup, tourists need to brush up on their Sarf Efrican

    Braai
    What is a braai? It is the first thing you will be invited to when you
    visit South Africa. A braai is a backyard barbecue and it will take place
    whatever the weather. So you will have to go even if it’s raining like mad.
    At a braai you will be introduced to a substance known as mieliepap.

    Ag
    This one of the most useful South African words. Pronounced like the “ach”
    in the German “achtung”, it can be used to start a reply when you are asked
    a tricky question, as in: “Ag, I don’t know.” Or a sense of resignation:”Ag
    OK, I’ll have some more mieliepap then.” It can stand alone too as a signal
    of irritation.

    Donner
    A rude word, it comes from the Afrikaans “donder” (thunder). Pronounced
    “dorner”, it means “beat up.” A team member in your rugby team can get
    donnered in a game, or your wife can donner you if you come back from a
    braai at three in the morning.

    Eina
    Widely used by all language groups, this word, derived from the Afrikaans,
    means “ouch.” Pronounced “aynah”. You can say it in sympathy when you see
    your friend the day after he got donnered by his wife.

    Hey
    Often used at the end of a sentence to emphasize the importance of what
    has just been said, as in “You’re only going to get donnered if you come in
    late again, hey?” It can also stand alone as a question. Instead of saying
    “excuse me?” or “pardon me?” when you have not heard something directed at
    you, you can always say: “Hey?”

    Izit?
    This is another great word to use in conversations. Derived from the two
    words “is” and “it”, it can be used when you have nothing to contribute if
    someone tells you something at a braai. For instance, if someone would say:
    “The Russians will succeed in their bid for capitalism once they adopt a
    work ethic and respect for private ownership.” It is quite appropriate to
    respond by saying: “Izit?”

    Ja well no fine
    This is another conversation fallback. Derived from the four words: “yes”,
    “well”, “no” and fine”, it roughly means “OK”. If your bank manager tells
    you your account is overdrawn, you can, with confidence, say:
    “Jawelnofine.”

    Klap
    Pronounced “klup” – an Afrikaans word meaning smack, whack or spank. If
    you spend too much time in front of the TV during exam time, you could end
    up getting a “klap” from your mother. In America , that is called child
    abuse. In South Africa , it is called promoting education. But to get
    “lekker geklap” is to get motherlessly drunk.

    Lekker
    An Afrikaans word meaning nice, this word is used by all language groups
    to express approval. If you enjoyed a braai thoroughly, you can say: “Now
    that was lekk-errrrrrr!” while drawing out the last syllable.

    Tackies
    These are sneakers or running shoes. The word is also used to describe
    automobile or truck tyres. “Fat tackies” are really wide tyres, as in:
    “You’ve got lekker fat tackies on your Vôlla, hey?”

    Dop
    This word has two basic meanings, one good and one bad. First the good: A
    dop is a drink, a cocktail, a sundowner, a noggin. When invited for a dop,
    be careful! It could be one sedate drink or a blast, depending on the
    company. Now the bad: To dop is to fail. If you “dopped” standard two
    (Grade 4) more than once, you probably won’t be reading this.

    Saamie
    This is a sandwich. For generations, school- children have traded
    “saamies” during lunch breaks. In South Africa you don’t send your kid to
    school with liver-polony saamies. They are impossible to trade.

    Bakkie
    This word is pronounced “bucky” and can refer to a small truck or pick-up.
    If a young man takes his “girl” (date) in a bakkie it could be considered
    as a not so “lekker” form of transport because the seats can’t recline.

    Howzit
    This is a universal South African greeting, and you will hear this word
    throughout the country. It is often accompanied with the word “Yes!” as in:
    “Yes, howzit?”. In which case you answer “No, fine.”

    Now now
    In much of the outside world, this is a comforting phrase: “Now now, it’s
    really not so bad.” But in South Africa , this phrase is used in the
    following manner: “Just wait, I’ll be there now now.” It means “a little
    after now”.

    Tune grief
    To be tuned grief is to be aggravated, harassed. For example, if you argue
    with somebody about a rugby game at a braai and the person had too much dop
    (is a little “geklap”), he might easily get aggravated and say.: “You’re
    tuning me grief, hey!”. To continue the argument after this could be unwise
    and result in major tuning of grief..

    Boet
    This is an Afrikaans word meaning “brother” which is shared by all
    language groups. Pronounced “boot” but shorter, as in “foot”, it can be
    applied to a brother or any person of the male sex. For instance a father
    can call his son “boet” and friends can apply the term to each other too.
    Sometimes the diminutive “boetie” is used. But don’t use it on someone you
    hardly know – it will be thought patronizing and could lead to you getting
    a “lekker klap”.

    Pasop
    From the Afrikaans phrase meaning “Watch Out!”, this warning is used and
    heeded by all language groups. As in: “The boss hasn’t had his coffee yet –
    so you better pasop boet” Sometimes just the word “pasop!” is enough
    without further explanation. Everyone knows it sets out a line in the sand
    not to be crossed.

    Skop, Skiet en donner
    Literally “kick, shoot and thunder”, this phrase is used by many South
    African speakers to describe action movies. A Clint Eastwood movie is
    always a good choice if you’re in the mood for of a lekker skop, skiet en
    donner flick.

    Vrot
    Pronounced – “frot”. A expressive word which means “rotten” or “putrid” in
    Afrikaans, it is used by all language groups to describe anything they
    really dislike. Most commonly intended to describe fruit or vegetables
    whose shelf lives have long expired, but a pair of old tackies (sneakers)
    worn a few years too long can be termed “vrot” by some unfortunate folk
    which find themselves in the same vicinity as the wearer. Also a rugby
    player who misses important kicks or tackles can be said to have played a
    vrot game – opposite to a “lekker” game (but not to his face). A movie was
    once reviewed with this headline: “Slick Flick, Vrot Plot.” Could also be
    used as an expression” I got vrot last night” (drunk)

    Rock up
    To rock up is to just, sort of arrive (called “gate crash” in other parts
    of the world). You don’t make an appointment or tell anyone you are coming
    – you just rock up. Friends can do that but you have to be selective about
    it. For example, you can’t just rock up for a job interview.

    Scale
    To scale something is to steal it. A person who is “scaly” has a doubtful
    character, is possibly a scumbag, and should rather be left off the
    invitation list to your next braai.

    Ja-nee
    “Yes No” in English. Politics in South Africa has always been associated
    with family arguments and in some cases even with physical fights. It is
    believed that this expression originated with a family member who didn’t
    want to get a klap or get donnerred, so he just every now and then muttered
    “ja-nee”. Use it when you are required to respond, but would rather not
    choose to agree or disagree.

  • 383

    @Treehugger – But did you noice – sharks don’t have balls!
    So, thanks for again pointing out the virility of the BULLS.

  • 384

    ok, guys and girls
    i’m outta here
    moet sê: ekt my gate uit geniet vandag

    gbs
    geluk broe! hoop dit word ñ instelling. dink ons kan dalk weer so maak die week voor die s14 begin?

    cheers!!

  • 385

    382@ashley dink jy die kak als self uit bra? dis floking snaaks gooi nog.wat van chom en china en branna en coke

  • 386

    :yawn:

  • 387

    Moeg ge insult wil nou net rugga praat

  • 388

    Insult van die dag?

    Jy is by jou ma se poephol uit gebore , want haar poenanie was te besig.

  • 389

    388@The-Pill

    Dis erger as iemand jou n WP ondersteuner noem… 😆

  • 390

    Dis is ‘n prettige Thread hierdie, en dit het nooit hande uitgeruk of ontaard in Wêreldoorlog III nie….

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